Friday, September 10

bang.

We started this thing to help people keep track of us, and so we could share our experiences on the road.

The road kicked me in the nuts.

It was nothing like we thought it would be. Not to say we regret it. We loved it. We still do. We miss parts of it, and we miss other parts less. We prepared for the wrong things, and then had to hit the ground running whenever we crashed. We had no time to catch a breath, and less time to deal with what people have called the "Real world."

I can't even begin to list what I learned from the trip. But there is one thing I know for certain. This "Real World" people are so fond of forcing down my throat is no more significant than anything I chose to do, or have done. My world is as real as anyone else's.
"You're livin' the dream!" was repeated to me in dozens of different tones, from adoring to criticizing to bitter. Not a one of them knew that there was nothing dreamlike about it. It was the most brutal, wonderful, damaging, and changing thing to ever happen to me. I set out for a deliberate walkabout, and wound up changing in the most unexpected and bizarre ways.
It was annoying.
The ways I wanted to change became insignificant. I suppose that tells you something about what I wanted to be...

I am saying all of this (and vaugely, I might add) because I realized this week that once I hit the road, I talked about it...but I never told anyone about it. I tried to share it, and wound up keeping a lot more to myself. I think it was suppose to be a pretentious induced Jack Kerouac sort of deal.
Instead it became a highly personal and deeply changing ride.

I wanted to share it. I wanted to show people what I was doing. I wanted to help people stop being afraid to do what they wanted and loved. I wanted to "be the change".
Instead the current took me farther from where I wanted to go than I had thought it would.

Now here I am. My life keeps getting better and worse at the same time. I don't think I'd want anything less.



To everyone who followed us, helped us, pushed us, or generally watched us from afar...there is no text big enough, no voice loud enough, and no words sincere enough for what I want to say to all of you.

Thank you. I hope I never made you regret it.


I have to go plant a garden.

See you, steampunks!
~Cap

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