But practice was essential

Being in stationary/"can't go anywhere because the Icarus' guts are literally hanging out in the open" mode has afforded me the ability to tell you things on a regular basis.

How different.

Though, Lois mentioned that I should look into if Verizon will allow me to twitter things, and if I will not be charged because I have an unlimited texting plan. Anyone know the answer to this one?

---

The Icarus repairs are going along semi-well. Ethan has fixed the problems we had, but discovered new ones or while repairing- as I mentioned in my last post- things fell apart at his finger tips from being swiss-cheese rusted out. So new problems have arisen. Of course, we should be able to leave here either tomorrow night or Friday afternoon without problem. It's just that, he said, we'll want to get those other things fixed asap.

So... yeah.

I'm not kidding about any help is accepted. Nothing is too small, even if you just repost our tale elsewhere to your own friends. I've tried to be more upbeat in past posts, like we've received a bunch of people offering anything, but really, it's been strangely quiet. I thank the few people who have stepped forward in our time of need with whatever they can offer; it is very much appreciated. It kind of shows me who is listening along to this weird little radio play we've got going on and who only swings by when they remember we exist. :'\

---

I watched a Dresden Dolls concert this evening with the Captain. Listening to Trash McSweeney sing "Mad World" brought me to tears. That song kills me every time. I think it must be the lyrics, because even Tears for Fears do it.

I'm really contemplating something drastic to change my physicality. I'm a little irritated and unhappy with it. I keep seeing people who, despite their shape or size or skin tone, find "their" look and work it. Nay, rock it.

I need to find "my" look. Something that I can wear and it will just look plain good on me. Sometimes, I would ask Rapture for his opinion of how something looks, and he tells me I look great, and then later I would see pictures and be disappointed. I'm sure to him I looked great, but it just wasn't doing it for me. One of the things I've been really aware of as far as my own sense of self-image goes, is that I know I won't be 100% happy until I find myself attractive. And really, that's not a bad thing to go on, except that I am extremely judgmental on the physical when it comes to attractiveness on women. But, if I can even get to be like 80% happy that would be good, right? ^_^

So, I'm considering hacking off a lot of my hair, and curls and frizz be damned.

This is, of course, something I need to consider for a while. Plus, problem, I'm not exactly a hairstylist and we come back to the little issue of me not knowing what looks good on me.

I feel like I need someone to dress me and do my hair and then say "Okay, this is what looks good. Stop doing all those other bland, plain, frumpy things, because you look gorgeous like this, and you know it."

Don't you hate how every now and then you can look into the mirror, see yourself, and think "Wow, I look great" and its quickly followed by "Why can't I look like this to everyone at all times?"

Ah well.

---

So I'm gonna get going now. Because I can't get all personal when people may come in the room. It throws things off for me. I've always worked alone, late at night, with no one around. It lets me focus on just myself and my own thoughts. ::shrug:: Plus, I don't like people reading what I'm writing until I'm done, because when I'm done, that's fine. It's been polished and you can't watch my brain think as I type at that point.

But... I miss writing. I actually was thinking, this morning as I laid here in this room that is not my own but that reminds me of my grandmother's guest room and with a Bengal kitty cat at my feet, that I'd like to have a laptop. But then I remembered that I hate them so, and would love to design a laptop-desktop hybrid.

Much love,
Whisper

On the road and at libraries once more

Quick post:

Back on the road after Anime Boston. We made a good chunk of money, but not what I was aiming for. We have PortCon coming up so that will be a good time! We are running a few events:

Saturday June 20th at PortCon Maine

10am-11am
Steampunk 101: Where Are We Going and Why Am I In This Dirigible?
(An FAQ on Steampunk!)

2pm
"Impromptu" Steampunk Photoshoot
(Talk to us throughout Friday and we'll figure out where we're hosting this! Bring your camera! Or a friend with a camera if you're coming in your steam-finest.)

6pm-8pm
Steampunk It! DIY Props and Costume Making
(Our infamous props and costume panel... now in a 2 HOUR SLOT!)

Sunday at PortCon Maine
Several of the Dreadfuls will be entering the Boffer Tournament!


Other than that... I'm looking forward to camping with our new rivals, Dr. Heron and Lady Blackwood next weekend. And going to The Toadies concert this weekend. I've really needed Toadies. It will be a nice recharge. ^_^

My tiny top hats sold like crazy- this makes me happy that people liked them so much.

We're also hopefully going to be doing that ren faire in CT next month, but not sure about out CT-Con status. We may just be there Friday for the con.

Rapture is getting off the Icarus for a few weeks. I'm going to miss him. :(

But right now we are all together, and at The Baron's. And about to go home to his place to play some Magic the Gathering, and then I'm going to work on more tiny top hats and tiny bowlers. We may even have a bonfire tonight.

And Rapture won't be gone forever, just a few weeks. I can tell he really, really needs it. The road isn't entirely for him, but he loves us- cause we're his crew, his family- and he wants to keep doing things. But he feels more useful building stuff back at his house. Which, to me, makes sense.

I had a good time at Anime Boston, and met a bunch of new people. And Max, if you read this, email us! People are looking for you on the AB forums!

I stayed up all night Friday, didn't get to bed until like almost 3am Sunday morning/Saturday night. I ran into the Captain around midnight Friday and we got a game of Are You A Werewolf? going. And people hunted us down the next night to play again. I also ran into Mike, one of the GMs from TempleCon's LARP! He even ran a round of Werewolf for us on Saturday heh

But yeah...

I should get going, have only a few more minutes to check everything.

Pretty much: I am okay. Frustrated at times, feel like I'm in the way a bunch, and don't like the cycles of "everything's good/everything's awkward" but I'm surviving.

Love you, guys.

~Whisper

Heading to Boston for the con!

So this weekend is our first convention since we left solid ground.  The rest of the Dreadfuls will be there, and everyone of our extended family with I believe the exception of my best friend, The Baron.

We leave tonight at about 5.  We still need to stitch up a few things, pack up clothing and costumes, and do all grooming and cleaning type things to make sure we don't start the weekend as smelly otaku.

It should be interesting.  We have a LARGE room for the panel, which surprises me since they had us jump through so many hoops in the first place to get the panel and then they put us in a ballroom?!

I just hope that Baku staff is there early tomorrow so that I can get in and set up our table.  I need to work Baku's table a bit, but I'm hoping some of the other Dreadfuls who want to go to Baku this year will also help out.  Shouldn't be that hard. ^_^

Anyway, see some of you there!

Much love,

Whisper

I can feel the excitement burning

I've been having trouble this past week when it comes to sleeping.  I will stay up and get tired, and be like, holy crap I have to sleep.  And then I get into bed and my body is tired but my brain wakes back up as I try to figure out what I need to do, who I need to contact, wonder about what will happen at AnimeBoston, and just generally try to put myself in a mindset that is appropriate for all things.  You know, keep myself in check and make sure I'm not getting my hopes up or taking things to mean more than they do and that I'm a healthy distance from things.  Reality checks, as they were.

I really hope that, when AB is over, this goes away.  Because before I got excited about the coming con season and it burned into my brain, I was pretty good about passing the hell out once my head hit the pillow.

As the Captain said, though, we spent a night out hanging with Ximon and Grant from TempleCon.  I really wish we had been better able to get in touch with them while we were here and not just the last week of our stay.  They were a great time.  And we helped them save a stray/lost kitty.  Did I mention this? I may have.

Last night, or yesterday rather, I got a call from Baron von Fogel seeing if we were up for hanging out and if he could bring a fellow friend who was into steampunk.  This sounded like a good plan, ,and it was.  I was especially amused because- as we pulled up- I saw von Fogel had something in his hands.  Captain recognized it as what it was.  And I laughed and said "Von Fogel must really like us if he wants to show of his stemapunk'd -that thing-."  Well, turns out he didn't want to show it off: it was what he worked on with the friend, Adian, while they stayed up on Sunday night working on an 8 page paper to distract them a little bit from it and not burn out.  It was something he had scavenged from the Brown students, who had left campus this past weekend, and he said, "I couldn't justify shipping it back to LA, so I figured I would give it to my steampunk friends."

It is awesome.  It had to have a few actual repairs done to it, which makes it look 10x cooler.  And we are totally bringing it to AB to harass people.  I'm not saying what it is until after the con though, because I want to see people's reactions rather than read about them. ^_~

So today is our last full day here at Katie's.  She said we may be able to get some On the Borders, my favorite restaurant that I haven't had much of since the one in Nashua closed.  I need to work on more stuff, some drawings, etc.  I gave up on the two bustles I was planning on making mostly because we got nothing done Monday (after being up till 730 am having hung out with TempleCon peoples) and nothing done yesterday after not being able to get a gps to help us get to a craft store, finding out that the shattered window on the Icarus' top cab has disappeared (completely busted out now- not just spider webbed) and we had to patch it up (Icarus now has an eye patch...), and then seeing von Fogel and friend.  I just don't have the time for it.  I will bring the stuff to make them, just in case I want to build at AB.

But yeah...

Tomorrow, we take the 4-something train into Boston to hang with my friend from high school, Liz.  She is letting us crash at her house.  And then I need to get up super early Friday to get into AB and start setting shit up to sell things.

Wish me luck...

~Whisper

Itch, itch, itch

I feel the itch to write, but not so much on the blog-type end of things.  I want to write fiction, prose, things with beginnings, middles, and ends, dialogue.  You know the stuff.

Still in Rhode Island for about another week.  Then AB, then back here to snag the Icarus, then potentially going to Cape Cod.  From there it's PortCon.  I'm not sure where we are going to stay between AB and PortCon if we don't go to the Cape.  Anyone with a driveway and bathroom/shower they'd like to offer us for a few days, please let me know.  Pretty much anywhere an hour from the coast of New England is fair game for us at this point.

Enough about that though.  I'm here to be selfish and talk about myself, since a few people have sent me texts telling me I haven't posted in a long time.

So...

I was trying to sleep but was fitful and restless.  I want to swim, and go on a diet and a toxin flush.

I want my kitty like crazy.  But I worry that seeing him again will just make me miss him more, since I won't be able to spend too much time with him.  I want to bring his foster mum a big bag of kitty food as a way of saying "thank you", and if I sell stuff at AnimeBoston next weekend and can find a way up to Nashua, I will likely do so.

I need new shoes.  I've needed new shoes since before the lease was up on my apartment.

With Katie's help, I've been busy making hand-crafted items for AB.  I have a LOT more left to make, though.  But today was a bad day, a rainy day, and I only knitted two cuffs and did nothing else.  Well, I made tacos.

I hate emotional outbursts.  I had one today.  I feel embarrassed, a little ashamed.  In some ways, I wish I could take it back, but I feel better having gotten it out.  I just don't like the idea of anyone seeing me get like that.  I shouldn't bottle things so much- it might save me from these eventual explosions.  Though, it is nice that- having done so- like I said, I do feel better for it.  It just might prove to be better for everyone if I try to express my feelings on a more regular basis so that I don't let things fester and rot.

I miss the Baron.  I don't know if he will be at AB.  But I am looking forward to having Katie along with us.  And hanging with Magda, Gid and Ed, Miss Elizabeth, Magik, Sarah, and then seeing all the Dreadfuls together again.

I'm not sure what I'm going to do after I post this... Like I said: I want to write.  But I hate laptops ::sigh::  And this one isn't mine.  I should go back to bed, and get into an earlier rising pattern.  I need to be up and at AB by 8am on Friday.  I likely won't get much sleep all that weekend.  I need to figure out how to pack light, bring a few outfits, a blanket and pillow, and then all of the stuff we are selling.

It's going to be... a challenge.  That's for sure.

Well, anyway.  There must be something interesting for me to read about on this great big internet.

~Whisper

Cross-posted on MySpace

I'm heading out in a few to go to Salvation Army with Cap, Rapture, and Katie.  But yesterday was a good day.

*Baked!

*Saw The Baron, Lucretia, Gideon, and Edward!

*Saw Wolverine, which I ultimately had fun at even if most of the other people at the midnight premiere were less than pleased. I could have stood to have Gambit actually have an accent the *whole* time; the kid slipped a bunch.  I guess the cartooon X-Men version will always be Gambit to me, just as Mark Hamill will always be my Joker.

*At the theatre, a kid came up to the Captain and I and asked if we were steampunks.  He was so amazed to actually meet people who were steampunk- it is still very underground, even though we don't feel that way.  The everyday person doesn't see it that much.  Especially in New England, where it is all spread out.

*We then got recognized as Penny Dreadfuls when we went into the theatre.  It got us the seats we wanted, too.  Otherwise the kids were not going to stand up and let us in. Ha!

So yeah.

Gotta get going, but just wanted to check in.

Much love,

Whisper

Damn you, LaborReady!

So we contacted LaborReady.  That is a bust.  Seems that they don't have an application interview until MAY 20TH!  O.o?  Really?  Geez!

Now our plan is to look into temp agencies and see if we can't find a little work with that.  But Katie's parents have also offered to have us work around their house a bit, since her father really shouldn't be raking the rocks out of the backyard.  We're happy to do this!  Especially since they have been so amazing to us these past few days.

I just had a bit of a conversation with the Captain about Star Trek: Next Gen, and Deep Space 9, and now I really want to watch all 7 and 5 seasons. ^_^

Last night we watched "Kino's Journey".  It was interesting.  I liked some of it a lot, but overall it left me wanting.  Katie said their are movies that follow it- I think I need to reserve judgment until I've seen them.

Well!  Gonna go eat some burgers!  Rapture and Katie will be back soon with new rakes for the rocks, too.

Much love,

Whisper

Creature comforts

Creature comforts are nice.  Things like not boiling inside an RV at 90 degrees.  And your milk not going rancid just by sitting in your not-plugged-in fridge.  And being able to take a shower, do your laundry, put on make-up, wash your hair, cook your food, wash your dishes.  Spread out on a bed.  Watch a movie, or a television show, or go for a walk without worrying about your home being broken into/ticketed/messed with.

These are things that are easy to learn out here.

But what I like is a fan blowing.  And the ability to casually lie in the Icarus because I want to, not because I have to.  To plug in my phone and see full charge in the morning so I can later talk to someone for two hours.

I have a good plan on what to make.  I talked with Ashley today and we worked through some things about what I should be working on for AnimeBoston, to sell there.  So I wrote down my list of things, and I'm gonna get working on them.  I also have a couple things on my list that I think the guys would like to make, or that maybe they could at the very least work on for me if they would be so nice. ^_^

We spent last night, tonight, and will spend likely through Friday here in the 'burbs of Rhode Island.

It has been fantastically good for the mind, the stomach, and the cleanliness of the body.  I thank Katie, our hostess, and her parents- and Sarah for introducing us to her.

Tomorrow, when we wake up, Captain and I are heading to check out the LaborReady and figure out when the best time to go in would be to get work.  Hopefully we will be able to get to work tomorrow maybe too?  Then Wednesday, Rapture and I will go in (hopefully.)  And Thursday, Rapture and Captain will go in while Katie and I do some baking (yay!)  Then Thursday night, we're heading with her to Manchester, NH to check out a midnight premiere of the Wolverine movie.  I think we are spending the night up there, then coming back down here Friday.

Saturday, we're seeing the Ocean State Circus performers again, during a rehearsal.  Hopefully Simon will be able to talk to the Captain about setting up some time to chill together and him learning some poi.  I would like to, Saturday and Sunday, hunt down a nice town commons to try out our busking.  According to Katie's dad, a former cop, Rhode Island is pretty nice about busking.  The only thing we'll have a problem with is Waterfire- which is the second time we heard that the guy in charge is all about the money money.  Sad, really.

Jess, whom we met at Nexus, has suggested we try out Northampton, MA which is a great idea.  I really enjoy Northampton.  We just need to find people we KNOW there, before we go.

I am happy that RI is good with not bugging people about this sort of thing, though.  I think, too, that starting small and going to somewhere that isn't the City will be good.  Give us a chance to try things out without a terribly scrutinizing eye.  People may be more forgiving if we are not perfect.

But... I am going to try to get some sleep.  SE7EN is on... it reminds me of when I had a Halloween party and Ross dressed as the killer. ^_^  They're about to receive the box, and that wisp of hair will waft out of the top.  Ohh, delightful.

Much love,

Whisper

New blog post on my myspace

I was going to cross-post here, but running out of time so:

http://www.myspace.com/whispermerlot

There, I posted about the past few days and some rambling of feelings and opinions. ^_^

Much love,
Whisper

My turn!

A few mins left at the library:

I am well.
I am tired.
I want better access to bathrooms at night, but ah well.
I am cold often at night. :(
I miss my kitty something terrible. He keeps popping into my dreams.
I am knitting.
I am with friends.
I need to have teh skillz at something.
I am not sure about a lot of things, but know that my life is pretty awesome. Even if this is the only moment when it is.
Providence and her surroundign areas... not bad. And BEAUTIFUL.
Need more cons and places to sell our stuff...
FORGOT the mini-Alans!! WTF!? Grah! So mad.
Still hoping the Captain's moped sells, Doc is trying to do that for him.

I want to type more but can't. But figured I should, since the Captain has been the only one posting for a while.

Much love,
Whisper